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Alright, so ever since watching Eric Metaxas' book selling spiel on Bonhoeffer, I've been in the mood to watch Veggie Tales. Well, low and behold, found a copy of Josh and the Big Wall and laughed and sang my heart away. After that ever so short shot of enjoyment, I decided to rewatch it w/ the audio commentary, when I stumbled across this jewel:

Phil Vischer: Now Aunt Ruth, the Aunt Ruth slide. *they talk over each other* You got something to say about that?

Mike Nawrocki: Around that time I actually remembered there was a website devoted to the existence or non-existence of Aunt Ruth, because we had mentioned her a few times, and we had never shown her. So in that slide, if you'll stop on that frame, you'll notice there's a sequence of numbers running up the side and if you translate it in the a=1, b=2, c=3...

Phil: It says something.

Mike: It says something.

Phil: But we won't say what.

Mike: Oh, okay you have to figure it out.

Phil: Yea, It says something about Aunt Ruth. And there's a very long story I could tell you about Aunt Ruth, but I don't think we'll tell it.

Spoiler!

Decrypted: Aunt Ruth lives.

Now that one of life's great mysteries has been resolved, you can return to your regularly scheduled programing.

Soccer boring? Huh?

Not your typical repeat, don't worry. There's obviously multiple reasons for this sentiment, but to touch on the highlights.

There is the action factor.

However, I'm on the lookout for another explanation: average shot length. ASL is a huge factor in film, the duration of clips/shots having an impact on the texture. On average, I've seen the number as 5 seconds, or 4-6 to be more precise. This hasn't always been the case and is attributed to increasing audience ADD and increased cinematographic awareness. Yuri Tsivian points out:

[T]he fastest film made between 1902 and 1909 has an ASL of 15.8 seconds while the slowest one made between 2000 and 2006 has an ASL of 10.01 seconds. In other words, the fastest runner in the beginning-of-the-past-century group is 5.7 seconds behind the slowest one of the twenty-first century.

Now this doesn't take into account everything, especially the content and complexity of the shots. A long shot can captivate us, and a boring short clip is still, well boring.

Soccer is an admittedly subtle game in regards to appreciation. While watching the Germany/Uruguay game though, I noted that the shots are exceptionally long compared to what most TV viewers are accustomed to. Even basket ball, baseball, and gridiron football camera shots are much shorter, and while I have no idea of hockey, I'd guess this is the case too. Haven't seen any research regarding ASL & sports, but it seems to me that commercialist sociologist or academics should get to it.

Obviously though, there's another problem: announcers. Now, TV commentators are always annoying. Generally, it's better to hit the mute and turn on the radio where descriptive play-by-play announcing, real analysis, and relevant stats is going on. Seriously though, if you're gonna pay someone to just talk is it really that hard to find someone who is good at it?

Airbender Update

Just got off the phone with my Mother who apparently loved it. She liked the action, loved the acting of Aang and the "little girl" (not sure if she meant Katara or Princess Yue). So, take my spin for what it is. FYI - she has not seen the anime.

The Last Airbender?

Don't worry, there will be no spoilers.

M Night Shyamalan, what happened? You used to be a director with promise? Now? You direct duds. The Happening was funnier than this movie; albeit the we were laughing at the film, even after we had to abandon our hope that you had produced something worthwhile. Lament is over.

The film is the first installment of a trilogy; assuming it grosses enough at the box office. A big assumption, given the following factors.

Forget inconsistencies, who cares? But there's no humor. I mean zip, none, nada. Not one single joke, and the only time the audience laughed was during two fight scenes. The anime series had a rich narrative, this one was exposition and action-scenes. Whereas the plot twists were carried on Nickelodeon by fortuitousness, revelations that develop the characters, engagement with the world on their journey, and common sense; this one relied on deus ex machina (like I said, no spoilers). As mentioned, I don't mind the inconsistencies; liberal licences should be encouraged. However, all they did was strip the show's mythology and personalities of any substance. I don't know why Sokka and Katara are in the film, except as incompetent guardians and cause they're main characters in the show. The Eastern philosophy implemented is hokey and pop culturish; any tangential contemporary issues like the Water Tribe's misogyny is dropped as no one has any personality flaws. Oops, I forgot, the bad guys are Arabs. Admittedly, the fighting was cool and creative. Then again, they shouldn't pat themselves on the back too much as all they had to do was copy the show. The styles though are divorced from their Eastern thought.

This boils down to the film's weakest characteristic, one that any kid I'm sure can tell you. It wasn't fun. I loved the animated TV show. Would give it a 4.5/5 and would argue with the critic it deserves at least a 4. This film? 1.5 maybe 2.

Got Plans Tonight?

Why not make it a special night for that special someone and watch a special movie. If you're looking for suggestions, why not go for something seasonal, say The Game of Their Lives (also released as The Miracle Match)? Replete with historical inaccuracies, which let's face it, nobody cares about, and adapted to film by the same folks that brought you classics like Rudy and Hoosiers. This box office success has tons of surprises. Jean-Luc Picard narrates (playing a 107 year-old dead man). The head couch is Gimli, and Joe Gaetjens is portrayed by the Haitian. @ PG, it's something alright for the whole family, or that special somepersons!

Don't bomb out with the usual delivery pizza, remember after-all the word is special. Nothing less than buffalo wings or or take-out Chinese will do. Fry up some fish and chips. And why not wash this down with a nice cold Schlafly or O'Fallon?

So throw common sense out the window and enjoy!

P.S. I actually really enjoyed the film. Heard about it from an announcer during the England-US game. It's not a good film, but one can still have a good time watching it.

One Nation Under God

Some of you guys may know Austin Meek, for those who don't, this is his and three of his friends upcoming movie that they made during the road trip through the U.S.



Needless to say, I'll be viewing it, and hope you guys will to. Here is a link to their site. It should come out sometime this spring, but they're a bunch of good ol' boys at Texas A&M and Baylor so don't expect too much in the on time department.